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Good PR

Best press release. Ever.

People of “Media”,

Greetings. My name is Rob Theakston, international DJ, insanely successful artist and former gadfly about Detroit. You have heard of me.

You may not have noticed that the world famous DORKWAVE is throwing another one of their infamously legendary parties this weekend. Why is that? Because many of you once again have failed to pay attention — instead opting to publish crap about Kid Rock, a banal article about “saving” Detroit (or worse — making our city by the strait some sort of half hocked metaphor) and quite possibly a feature about a dinosaur Detroit punk rocker who is just now getting their “due”.

Here’s your chance to remedy The Situation(tm); to get it right and to correct people’s somewhat accurate perception that your pages are nothing but empty verb vomit — a waste of trees,  hard drives, drink tickets and real estate.

We challenge – nay – defy you to attend our event and report to your feeble readers just how awesome a time you had. Because it IS awesome. We’ll even put you on the guest list if you respond to this email, which you probably won’t because it contains too many polysyllabic words for your addled brain to fully comprehend.

Do something different with your life. Be the solution to your problem. Enjoy us, on us.

You have 24 hours to respond to this email for guest list privliges. Don’t say we didn’t warn you. Get the scoop before someone scoops you.

Cordially (but watch it),
Rob Theakston

ATTACHED: A press release for you to cut and paste word for word into your “website” or “blog”. Should you need a photo, we can readily supply that.

ps. I won’t be there.


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